So, I am pretending that my last post never existed. It was deleted recently, so the post I’m referencing no longer exists. It asked what direction you, the reader, wanted me to go with this blog and the responses involved ideas that were either too difficult to execute or far too broad. For not listening and adapting, I apologize. I know I haven’t posted much, and whenever I reappear, I make vague promises about new things that I’ll post and that I’m back for good. Clearly, I’m more fickle than I plan to be. For that, I also do apologize. This time, I am not going to promise you anything. As has been evidenced throughout the past, I’m not the most reliable when it comes to creating things to post on a blog. Would I like to utilize this medium more? Most certainly, though with my hectic schedule, I can’t help but wonder how rare my future posts might be. I don’t intend to fully abandon this website for years, though my posts will likely be few and far between. For those of you that stick with me, thanks. Your support is appreciated, though I certainly don’t expect it.
Readdressing my inability to keep my word in regards to this blog
So, before I create any posts that turn back to the introspective and philosophical, I’d like to give you an update on where I am in life and what has led me to this point.
Last semester, I wasn’t the most social of people. Every now and then, I’d eat a meal with a person or two in the dorm cafeteria, though all-in-all, most actual social events were ignored or I would craft excuses to allow me to abstain from attending. After the relationship with the previously aforementioned friend of mine was terminated in November, I almost completely cut myself off from the rest of the world save for one friend back home with whom I established a strong friendship earlier in the year. As the semester came to a close, I had been spending so much time alone, introspectively pondering my current situation, where my past had brought me, and where I need to go for my future, that I began to feel lonely, longing for socialization. By the time that these feelings were stirring, however, finals had finally arrived and the time for friendship unfortunately to be pushed back for about a month. Currently, I’m five weeks into the new semester. Unlike last semester, my classes occupy the majority of my time and I have little time to casually ride buses or play the piano, though a “new” element of life has been re-added into my daily routine. For the first time since high school, I am actively attempting to meet new people. The skill-set needed to make friends is something I nearly lost in translation as I inaccurately placed little importance on interactions with others and the others themselves. Though now socially anxious, my quest to make connections, no matter how slight, is proceeding much better than expected, as I now have a few small groups of people with whom I “regularly” spend free time. Currently, I’m in the process of relearning a life that is no longer tangent to the rest of the world. It’s a time for intersection. This process of figuring out how to live again has not been particularly easy, and I hope to have a post or two at some point in the future regarding my behavior and thought processes over this past few months.
Artistically, I’ve actually come more involved than I have been in years. Though I don’t do so on a regular basis, I’ve picked up amateur art photography as a hobby. I know nothing of photography or good composition, to be perfectly honest, but I have a lot of fun just going out and taking pictures. I don’t have a camera any better than what an iPod can offer, but, even unedited, the pictures don’t look too terrible. I update every now and then on this new blog on Tumblr called Visions of Insanity. If you have a Tumblr, your subscription would be much appreciated. I just want to share what little I can do alright in the realm of artistic expression. Click the link below to see the blog itself.
Again, I do hope to post on this blog more often, and I know that this last semester has given me some material to write on in my usual style, though how often I post will depend highly on how busy the semester keeps me. Currently, that means I likely won’t be posting much until March or afterwards. Your readership is still appreciated, especially with how many times I’ve “wronged” you all in the past. Thanks for sticking with me.